Grandmother

A grandmother is a babysitter who watches the kids instead of the television. - Author unknown.

I held her cold, pale hand as we strolled down the shades in the park last weekend. We recollected those days before I removed all the innocence and how much that place had changed since then. She grasped my hands in hers and gently rubbed them against mine. 'Why are your palms so rough?' she asked in that usual monotonous tone. 'Of course they're rough. I've been doing my own laundry for years, grandma.' With a soft sigh, 'Yeah, it's been hard on you these years. At least Alvin has your aunt around to take care of him.' I could only soothe her words by telling her how much I've learned while being away from home and I've never regretted my decision.

What she had never discerned was her hands are actually rougher than mine, that pair of hands rugged by her stormy experience as she traverses life, hardship gotten from taking care of the family and aging that came in line. She walked towards a bench to take her seat as she watched the kids play. At that moment, I wondered what was running through the mind of this elderly whom I love and respect most. That was a picture of her side view I caught as my heart clinched hard and whispered with empathy. It is a comfort, knowing you are safe. I knew there were many constant worries that had never escaped her duty as a mother cum grandmother.

She would call me occasionally if I hadn't been home for a couple of weeks, just to make sure I'm doing okay, if I'm eating properly or when is my next trip home etc etc. Once, I saw her sitting at a corner and into a deep thought when I accidentally noticed her teary eye. I felt the pain as though my heart was pounded by a fist of feminism. It's inevitable to stop caring for my grandmother because that is my responsibility. Even if it's not about duty that I have to fulfill, I'd still pray for a road that will never ever end for I enjoyed every moment I had with her. It's a joy in fact to be able to take care of her like how she took care of me when I was young. It has become a habit to share a part of what she's going through and the amount of comfort she has given to me is what that matters. She's someone great, someone whom I can never find a replacement for a better comfort zone. I'd pray for her even more than me.