End of the diet

Talked about a 2 week calorie conscious diet. Here's my progress.

Day 1 - All excited munching the boiled vegetables. :D
Day 2 - Oats. Kinda sick of being healthy. :]
Day 3 - Menu repeats. Yucks at boiled vegetables. :S
Day 4 - GIVE UP!!! Back to normal diet and loving fatty munches. :D
......
....
..
Day 14 - I lost no weight. >.<

Thanks to everyone for discouraging me. Blerrgghh...

I iz happy, I iz sad

I don't know what is it that I'm feeling. I can't make up my mind what is it that I want. Because I always lose the things I like, I'm not even confident to speak out now. I don’t mind when conversations get a little boring. I don’t mind when we’re chatting and run out of things to say. It doesn’t matter to me because I finally realized that every moment spent doesn’t have to be breath-taking as long as it makes you feel comfortable. At some point it feels miraculous, next I doubt I can be so lucky. If given a month to decide on a reward, what's the best gift one can ask for? I have an answer yet I can't bring myself to say it. I've never done this, not even once and I do not know how? One month will probably be a hiatus filled with emptiness and hesitation, so just let it be. After all, who am I to decide the outcome?

Arghhh... this is a crappy, cheesy and silly but I guess I'll miss his presence. 

I iz happy, I iz sad, I iz happy, I iz sad, I iz happy, I iz sad.


Okay, something to keep me enlightened apart from those sticky feelings. Mulberry!! I can't take my eyes off Tillie, the pale blue washed denim!! Seriously, I'm so gonna get that prototype of elegance when I start earning. Or simply any bag from Mulberry. They are just too gorgeous I can't resist. :D :D :D

Playground

Hopscotch

See-saw

Tunnel slide

Ice-cream

Undisclosed Desire

"This is yet another classic maneuver to avoid emotional intimacy. I penned down my feelings because I lack the courage to tell you this. I want to let you in on a little secret. My disguise is so thin, I'm surprised you haven't seen right through me. There were times when I had the urge to tell you how happy I was whenever we talked. I don't know how you had made me felt so, you are just special. You make me laugh uncontrollably, feel indefatigable when I'm tired, encouraged when I'm discouraged, delighted when I'm bored and optimistic when I'm pessimistic. I'm uncertain if I should tell it to you, but I guess it's okay if you do not know cuz I doubt you feel the same way about me. If only you'd known how much I look forward to our meteor shower date, thank you for that offer. This should remain as an undisclosed desire till the day my doubt about what you feel about me is cleared. On that day, I'll show you this. I'm still hoping on something I call it, come-what-may."

Expired Food

I should learn how to moderate my habit of shopping binge when I do groceries in future. I'm always throwing food and foodstuff, like it happens almost every other day. :X Someone teach me to be more disciplined, please.

Sidewalk Cracks

I've always had this fascination with unique walls, especially the uncemented ones where the framework could be appreciated with the naked eye. I know it sounds kinda strange, but it's true. To me they are beautiful and once in a while, I would take a close-up look and realized how these walls have cracks that grew on its own. Often, before painting the walls in my house, I would make sure daddy had filled these defects with plaster, or they could appear obvious when the paint seeps through the faint narrow gaps. It's not something people will usually take notice of, yet a deep crack that winds its way to the core can tumble a wall. Beautiful as a whole, none can accurately predict what's splitting up on the other side.

Sometimes in life, we find such cracks in us too. It's a discovery of something out of the way, extraordinary or less anticipated. It becomes an obsession when we dwell too much upon these findings. Give a little pressure, it turns into a compulsion. I guess, looking at these cracks subtly is the best we can expect from the outcome. For having subtle hope doesn't bring as much disappointment as being on high hopes yet it keeps our spirits on guard.

기다리다 (Waiting)

어쩌다 그대를 사랑하게 된거죠
어떻게 이렇게 아플 수 있죠
한번 누구도 이처럼 원한 적 없죠
그립다고 천번쯤 말해보면 닿을까요
울어보고 떼쓰면 그대 내 맘 알까요

그 이름 만번쯤 미워해 볼까요
서운한 일들만 손꼽을까요
이미 사랑은 너무 커져 있는데
그댄 내가 아니니
내 맘 같을 수 없겠죠
그래요 내가 더 많이 좋아한거죠

아홉 번 내 마음 다쳐도
한번 웃는게 좋아
그대 곁이면 행복한 나라서
싫은 표정 한번 조차도
편히 지은 적 없죠
그대 말이면 뭐든 다 할 듯 했었죠

천년 같은 긴 기다림도
그댈 보는게 좋아
하루 한달을 그렇게 일년을
오지 않을 그댈 알면서
또 하염없이 뒤척이며
기다리다 기다리다 잠들죠

나 언제쯤 그댈 편하게 볼까요
언제쯤 이 욕심 다 버릴까요
그댈 모든게 알고 싶은 나인데
언제부터 내 안에 숨은 듯이 살았나요
꺼낼 수 조차 없는 깊은 가시가 되어

그댈 위해 아끼고 싶어
누구도 줄 수 없죠
나는 그대만 그대가 아니면
혼자인게 더 편한 나라
또 어제처럼 이 곳에서
기다리고 기다리는 나예요
기다리고 기다리는 나예요 

-윤하-

Calorie Concious Diet Commences

I've decided to go on a strict diet after realizing my BMI is almost crossing 20, which is urhh... okay, still within the normal range but it has increased dramatically over these two years ever since I returned to Malaysia! Believe it or not, I gained 7kgs in total! How should I not be frightened when I can no longer fit into all my shorts and pants. This itself is distressing while I feel like a balloon that has been inflated with fat.

Today, I'm determined enough to patronize the vegetables section and get a variety of them to whip up a meal. Bing Chi followed me to Jusco and we walked into GNC for a quick survey of lean drinks to replace our meals instead of eating. I wasn't quite impressed with that idea of just drinking, firstly cuz I need to chew on something and secondly, that bottle of lean shake is freaky costly! Rm179 for 16 meals. Thirdly, when I asked the salesman what's best to be consumed for losing weight, he gave me a puzzled look and pointed at a weight gainer. He started telling us his experience of losing 30kgs which he thought was a total suffer and finally advised us to live happily.

Then we went shopping for vegetables! Seriously, I could not imagine myself getting this clued-up over calorie when I'm someone who binges on unhealthy snacks all the time. We actually perused the nutrient table and counting calories for every food we got in our hands. Even for eggs, I bought a brand that serves only 62kcal/serving though it came in a pack of 15. Crazy I tell you, the way we studied the calorie table is more attentive than reading medical books. This time, I'm really good at maths! In the end after beating the odds, I got myself some cherry tomatoes, lettuce, potatoes, broccoli, kimchi(low caloric food!), eggs, oat, yoghurt and my favorite earl grey tea.

Two week from now!! Please remind me to be determined during this period of time. :D

What's next?

It irks me when life is going stagnant, as though I have nothing to look forward to and whatever I do is a routine. Somehow I'm led to a desperate desire to leave this place and look for a brighter sunshine out there. I know plainly this might be a regretful yearning, like how my seniors had brain washed me with their experiences. It's the least I can expect to prevent myself from being too pessimistic for I'm often a victim of let down, especially when I'm on high hopes. Consequently, the best way to combat my motionless life is to reanimate it with a change of environment and lifestyle. I so can't wait to graduate and start my working life. Somehow at this point of time, being a student for too long is indeed depressive.

Dear Lord, send me to where my heart is. Amen.

Holy Matrimony of Zuming and Yingying

@ The Raffles Country Club, Singapore.

The name, Zuming, would suggest that we're related since 祖(zu) is a cognomen used among most of us, cousins. Yes, the first grandson of the 戴(dai) clan is married. Some cool facts about Zuming's family; he has 9 sisters and their names end with 'Na'(Meina, Anna, Lingna, Tingna, Luona, Ruina, Mona, Xina, Aina). Took me some time to remember their names and till now, I've only talked to Zuming and the first 3 elder sisters. They would dress up in the same material during certain events which I thought was pretty cute, like how the kids dressed up in the same material made from curtains in The Sound of Music. They did it again today! The same material and pattern but different shades. :D My uncle has to walk the bride down the aisle for 9 times! Wow!! He has 8 more to go.

Last but not least, congratulations to the newlywed! God bless!

Partial 'Ter' clan. Spot daddy and his brothers. They look almost alike with similar eyes, wide forehead (I inherited this! ):) and male pattern baldness.

Time together...

... is just never quite enough especially when I'm with these people. When the day comes to an end, I start looking forward to the next hang out and missing them thereafter.

One Malaysia in Genting

Pretty relieved that I was able to spend this overrated holiday with much productivity. The one week span of break was well divided among family and friends. It was meant to be a group trip, but as usual, we never had it achieved successfully. Nothing but another Genting trip with Jiahong, Hassan and Karthik. See, we're 'Satu Malaysia'! While waiting for Karthik to arrive, we tried all the tedious rides like the Merry-Go-Round and Ribena-tea-cup. >.< Hello, what else could we do??

We went for the GLITZ show at night, a performance featuring illusion, suspense and imagination. What's worth the 75 bucks (after discount for WorldCard members) paid was the sand art animation by Daria Pushankina. Gawd, it was amazing and she's gorgeous!! Had our chill out session at The Patio after that. Yours truly visited the casino the following day and lost some grand buck there. Sigh. I feel so remorseful now over that big money I donated. This is what happens when you're doomed on the other side, isn't it? Aissshhh!! ): ): ): ): I'll never try my luck again after this virgin experience. Kill me if I do. :D

Ha

시크릿 가든

I'm still infatuated at the aftermath of a Korean romance. Secret Garden is one remarkable drama to be watched. I don't remember when was the last time I had such eagerness to finish a drama or even got fervent over the storyline, but certainly, it's been a while. I laughed hard on the first day and the on the second day, I started sobbing. Before the third day ended, I was all into the scenes with much sympathy and empathy. Such an innocent passion I had for this story that dumped me into bouts of ups and downs.

Have you ever been smitten by a romance which hardly exist, or maybe, has never existed? Like a play that portrays the greatness of love from a guy who would sacrifice for a girl despite being objected? Isn't this an emblematic content from a Korean director? Yes and it keeps me wondering if love does happen this way in reality or if our lives could be just like what is rendered. I asked and people told me it never happens, yet I was often enamored by these leading characters and went in search of perfection. Well, we're all envious of such a storyline, aren't we? So why we do not practice what has been preached in a drama and get a flawless life? Is it really gonna be that tough?

Damn, the scenes are all clogged in my flashbacks!