Love matters

Of late, my life has been a slightly mounted with emotions. This is a post, a post I wished it will be heard by you. Some words I had long wanted to tell you. Yet to keep it private, I delayed till now. For last night, my heart was torn the second time. So, here it goes.

Dear you,

It's always been a question in my head, what sort of relationship are we heading to? Sometimes, things get complicated between us. To make things mutual, we became bro and sis. Despite the bro-sis-relationship, we realized how we often fall into improper arguments. The affection was there. There's no way we could escape jealousy. As hard as I try to work my worrisome little mind around it, I wonder why do we put up with everything. The constant compromise and allowance from my part while the care and attention from yours. And all that waiting and wanting. It was tiring, I know. We think differently. We have different views about stuff.

Nearly 3 months of a different life from you since my fallback. Which left me all but a tad miffed because it made me resent not being able to see you as often as I'd like to. As we walked along, sometimes I found the dissimilarities between us. You noticed it as well. But we never voiced. Of both the mental and emotional stress I, albeit voluntarily, allow myself to be subjected to. And it was also at times like these that I’m reminded of how you constantly gave in to my whimsical demands, without complaint. The many wonderful ways in which you showed me how much you care.

Now that we really have to put a stop to it. I did not intend for all that I told you to happen. I didn't mean to lie nor cheat. I did not feel any better than you. For you know I like you more than you had imagined. All that patience and tolerance, understanding and acceptance. They seem so far away now. I hope you live a better life after me. And am always around if you need me. I'm just not the perfect girl for you. Take care!

Love,
-me-